Monday, 11 January 2010

I Like Kids. Couldn't Eat a Whole One Though

I always thought I was good with kids.
I've worked with them for years. Coaching various sports, holiday play clubs and the like.
You know the ones where hoards of weans get packed off to massive sport centers all day for two pound fifty a pop. Yeah? you get the idea.
Always though I was quite good at coming up with new games and ideas of daft things to do. A lot of the time involving loads of glitter, copious amounts of non brand stick type glue and quite a few feathers.

Something disastrous has happened. I don't know if it's because my weans are grown up now or if the 'grumpy old' gene has migrated from the Pirate and is now plotted up in my heid, but on Saturday evening I became part of a growing band of 'grumpy olds'.
People like the NCP car park attendant with a limp who shouts at you "Oi pal! ye canny park there"
or the miserable janny that wont "git yer baw aff the roof" or the crabbit granny who forbids you from using her best cushions as steering wheels as you lollop round her living room playing F1 with your wee brother.

Me one of THEM can you believe it?

Picture the scene. Winter is still here. (I know, there's a whole other post in there)
You've travelled 400 hundred miles on a train that got delayed for nearly 2 hours.
Your one and only fails to meet you from the train as promised cos he's oot wi a WHW matey for a few bevvies.
Your nose is streaming like the River Tay in spate.
And yer Maw and Da have just jetted out to Goa for a fortnight (lucky bar stewards)

The snow that hampered your journey has brought London to a standstill. Gritters pah!! whats that. You enquire as to whether there are any 'yellow bins' around and told, No we don't have them here. Only to locate one of said bins not 100 meters from the front door.

And this was it my moment of glory.
The one and only hill in deepest darkest Ashtead is located at the entrance of whatshisnames close. The approach road none the less.
There was I, Mrs Mac. Ski jacket, Berghaus waterproof breeks (minus security tag) buff, gloves the lot!!

Gritting the road........

.......while the kids were STILL sledging on it!!!!!!

I keep checking under my hat, looking for the big white streak.
I think I might be turning into Cruella De Vil.

Mrs Mac x